Returning to work after having a baby is a significant transition, filled with mixed emotions and a range of challenges. In this interview, a working mom shares her personal experience about balancing work, motherhood, and self-care after returning to her job postpartum.
Can you describe your emotions when you first thought about returning to work after your baby was born?
I was definitely overwhelmed with emotions when I thought about going back to work. I know some people feel ready to get back into a routine, but for me, it was really tough. I had been breastfeeding and was so used to being with her all day, every day. The thought of being away from her for 9 hours felt heartbreaking.
How did you decide when the right time was to return to work postpartum?
Unfortunately as a working mom, it wasn't up to me. FMLA only guarantees you get to keep your job for 12 weeks, so that's when I returned.
Were there any workplace adjustments you needed to make to accommodate your new schedule (e.g., breastfeeding, childcare)?
I work as an OT in a couple of hospitals, usually my schedule is back-to-back all day seeing patients. I had to build in some extra pump break times and also pumped while eating lunch (which is also when I would be doing paperwork for work).
How did you juggle your responsibilities at work with your responsibilities at home?
For my job at the hospital, when I'm done with work for the day, I'm done with work and don't have to bring work home. Being back at work definitely made it harder to attend to household duties though, I'm lucky in that I have an extremely supportive husband! Since so much of my time was consumed with breastfeeding, my husband took over cooking and other household duties.
How did you find time for self-care while balancing both work and motherhood?
Back to my supportive husband! He always encourages me to make time for myself. He will watch our daughter so I can exercise, go get a facial or a massage, or take a nap.
How did you feel about leaving your baby with a caregiver or in daycare, and how did you make peace with it?
It made me really sad! I wish I didn't have to put her in daycare but at the same time I know it's so good for her to socialize.
How did your perception of work-life balance change after becoming a parent?
My husband got laid off right before he was supposed to go on paternity leave. After that happened we've really come to realize that to employers we are just a number/an employee, but to our families we are so much more and that we want to prioritize time with our family over time spent on work.
How do you think workplaces could better support parents returning after parental leave?
First of all, they could start by giving paid leave! I work in hospitals and healthcare workers don't get paid maternity leave. Crazy I know. You have the option to pay for short-term disability for yourself if you want then you have to use PTO if you have any before that will kick in.
Q: Can you describe your emotions when you first thought about returning to work after your baby was born?
A: To be honest, I hated thinking about going back to work. The very thought made me feel overwhelmed with dread. I didn’t want to leave my baby. I started to feel resentful that we weren’t financially well-off enough for me to stay home. I avoided discussing my return with my partner, pushing the conversation out as much as possible, but it was still constantly on my mind. I was anxious, just knowing that one day, I’d have to leave my baby behind.
There was this deep, simmering anger about how our culture expects women to return to work so quickly after childbirth. It felt so unfair, and I was enraged that this was just the way it was. I felt disrespected and forced into a situation I didn’t want to be in. It felt like torture. I wanted to be there for my baby all the time, to make sure she always felt my love, but that wasn’t something I could control when I had to leave her to go to work.
Even now, two months into working, I feel like I’m missing out on her growing up. I am missing it—and I hate that. It feels like I am losing a part of her, and I just want to be there, 100%. And to make matters worse, my milk supply has decreased significantly, which is so frustrating.
I try to tell myself that we are lucky—my partner is with the baby all day, and Grandpa fills in a bit in the afternoon before I get home. But still, I just want to be her mom. The reality is, we’re not rich, so I have to work, too. But it’s not what I want. I just want to be there with her, without the guilt of having to work.
Q: What is something you wish more people knew about the journey to motherhood?
A: My motherhood journey started 14 years ago when I was just 20 years old. I was young, poor, and alone. It was survival mode from day one. I didn’t have the luxury of focusing on anything but getting by. The thing is, there’s this enormous pressure to buy all the expensive stuff—like $1,000 strollers, fancy self-rocking beds, and the latest baby gear. But you don’t need all that.
What babies need most is you. They need your love, your care, and your presence. That’s all. They don’t care about fancy gear or brand-name products. So many people waste money on things that don’t really matter, when the most important thing is being there for your baby.
Trust me, you’ll have plenty of time to focus on money later. When they’re older, that’s when you’ll want to have your finances sorted. When they want to play an expensive sport or need a car, that’s the time to prioritize those big purchases. But right now, with a newborn, it’s all about connection. It’s all about love and security. The more you focus on yourself and your mental health, and less on what the world says you need to buy, the better.
Another huge piece of advice: Make sure your relationship with your partner is strong. They are going to see a different side of you after the baby arrives. You’ll go through a huge transformation, and you’ll need unconditional love and support. So, make sure that person in your life has your back, no matter what.
Motherhood can be so overwhelming, and it’s easy to feel like you're doing everything wrong. But if you just focus on the basics—your mental health, your partner, and the bond you share with your baby—it all becomes a little easier to manage.
Q: How did you decide when the right time was to return to work postpartum?
A: My experience going back to work this time was very different from my first. With my first child, I didn’t have much of a choice—it was more about when my maternity leave ended. But with this baby, the decision was out of my hands. At 13 weeks pregnant, I told my company I was expecting, and a week later, I was laid off. I spent my entire pregnancy stressing about finding another job that would support my family financially and provide health insurance.
Being laid off while pregnant, especially during an election year, made finding a new job incredibly difficult. Job opportunities were limited, and the uncertainty of the future made it even harder. After giving birth to my baby girl, I found myself in the hospital applying to jobs and scheduling interviews. An hour after I returned home from the hospital, I had an interview lined up that I had to attend.
After many interviews over a 6 month period, I finally found a job but my start date was only six weeks after having my daughter. I didn’t get to choose when the “right time” was for me to return to work; I just had to start during the next available training session.
Q: Did you feel like your workplace was understanding of your new role as a parent?
A: I am incredibly grateful to work for two companies that are extremely supportive of parents, particularly as a new mom to two young kids. Both jobs are remote, and they offer a lot of flexibility—one is full-time, and the other is part-time.
Being upfront about my needs was key. In my interviews, I made it clear that flexibility and understanding of my role as a working mother were non-negotiable. This honesty paid off, and it allowed me to secure not just one, but two positions that are supportive, flexible, and understanding of my new role as a parent.
Q: How did you juggle your responsibilities at work with your responsibilities at home?
A: The first few weeks were extremely difficult. I had just spent six months at home with my son while I was unemployed, so it was tough to go back to work and be away from my kids. At the same time, I was adjusting to a new job, which added to the pressure. It felt like I was being pulled in a million different directions.
But things started to change when I remembered something my boss used to emphasize—the importance of delegating tasks for your mental health. I realized that while it’s nice to have the newest gadgets or the best care, it was more important for me to prioritize things that would free up my time. I started investing in house cleaning services and paying my nanny more to handle simple tasks like grocery shopping and doing the kids' laundry. This allowed me to focus more on my work and my kids without stressing over everything else around the house.
Q: How did you find time for self-care while balancing both work and motherhood?
A: Finding time for self-care is still a work in progress, to be honest. I’ve learned that my workouts are often longer because I’m juggling a toddler and a 3-month-old. Sometimes, I incorporate my toddler into the workout—he’ll crawl all over me while I do push-ups, and honestly, it’s chaos, but it’s also a chance for us to be together and bond.
I’ve also come to realize just how important it is for my partner and me to carve out time for ourselves. We make sure to schedule weekly date nights, whether it’s a night out or just something simple at home after the kids go to bed. It’s essential for us to have that time together, just the two of us, to keep our relationship strong amidst all the chaos.
Q: If you could give one piece of advice to a new mom about returning to work, what would it be?
A: My biggest piece of advice would be to be honest—with yourself, your employer, and those around you—about what you need and how you can be supported. This transition is really difficult, and it comes with a lot of mixed emotions, and that’s okay. You’ll figure out what works best for you over time, so be patient with yourself. You don’t have to have it all figured out right away. Give yourself grace and allow yourself the time and space to adjust.
Returning to work after having a baby is a significant transition, filled with mixed emotions and a range of challenges. In this interview, a working mom shares her personal experience about balancing work, motherhood, and self-care after returning to her job postpartum.
Can you describe your emotions when you first thought about returning to work after your baby was born?
I was definitely overwhelmed with emotions when I thought about going back to work. I know some people feel ready to get back into a routine, but for me, it was really tough. I had been breastfeeding and was so used to being with her all day, every day. The thought of being away from her for 9 hours felt heartbreaking.
How did you decide when the right time was to return to work postpartum?
Unfortunately as a working mom, it wasn't up to me. FMLA only guarantees you get to keep your job for 12 weeks, so that's when I returned.
Were there any workplace adjustments you needed to make to accommodate your new schedule (e.g., breastfeeding, childcare)?
I work as an OT in a couple of hospitals, usually my schedule is back-to-back all day seeing patients. I had to build in some extra pump break times and also pumped while eating lunch (which is also when I would be doing paperwork for work).
How did you juggle your responsibilities at work with your responsibilities at home?
For my job at the hospital, when I'm done with work for the day, I'm done with work and don't have to bring work home. Being back at work definitely made it harder to attend to household duties though, I'm lucky in that I have an extremely supportive husband! Since so much of my time was consumed with breastfeeding, my husband took over cooking and other household duties.
How did you find time for self-care while balancing both work and motherhood?
Back to my supportive husband! He always encourages me to make time for myself. He will watch our daughter so I can exercise, go get a facial or a massage, or take a nap.
How did you feel about leaving your baby with a caregiver or in daycare, and how did you make peace with it?
It made me really sad! I wish I didn't have to put her in daycare but at the same time I know it's so good for her to socialize.
How did your perception of work-life balance change after becoming a parent?
My husband got laid off right before he was supposed to go on paternity leave. After that happened we've really come to realize that to employers we are just a number/an employee, but to our families we are so much more and that we want to prioritize time with our family over time spent on work.
How do you think workplaces could better support parents returning after parental leave?
First of all, they could start by giving paid leave! I work in hospitals and healthcare workers don't get paid maternity leave. Crazy I know. You have the option to pay for short-term disability for yourself if you want then you have to use PTO if you have any before that will kick in.
Q: Can you describe your emotions when you first thought about returning to work after your baby was born?
A: To be honest, I hated thinking about going back to work. The very thought made me feel overwhelmed with dread. I didn’t want to leave my baby. I started to feel resentful that we weren’t financially well-off enough for me to stay home. I avoided discussing my return with my partner, pushing the conversation out as much as possible, but it was still constantly on my mind. I was anxious, just knowing that one day, I’d have to leave my baby behind.
There was this deep, simmering anger about how our culture expects women to return to work so quickly after childbirth. It felt so unfair, and I was enraged that this was just the way it was. I felt disrespected and forced into a situation I didn’t want to be in. It felt like torture. I wanted to be there for my baby all the time, to make sure she always felt my love, but that wasn’t something I could control when I had to leave her to go to work.
Even now, two months into working, I feel like I’m missing out on her growing up. I am missing it—and I hate that. It feels like I am losing a part of her, and I just want to be there, 100%. And to make matters worse, my milk supply has decreased significantly, which is so frustrating.
I try to tell myself that we are lucky—my partner is with the baby all day, and Grandpa fills in a bit in the afternoon before I get home. But still, I just want to be her mom. The reality is, we’re not rich, so I have to work, too. But it’s not what I want. I just want to be there with her, without the guilt of having to work.
Q: What is something you wish more people knew about the journey to motherhood?
A: My motherhood journey started 14 years ago when I was just 20 years old. I was young, poor, and alone. It was survival mode from day one. I didn’t have the luxury of focusing on anything but getting by. The thing is, there’s this enormous pressure to buy all the expensive stuff—like $1,000 strollers, fancy self-rocking beds, and the latest baby gear. But you don’t need all that.
What babies need most is you. They need your love, your care, and your presence. That’s all. They don’t care about fancy gear or brand-name products. So many people waste money on things that don’t really matter, when the most important thing is being there for your baby.
Trust me, you’ll have plenty of time to focus on money later. When they’re older, that’s when you’ll want to have your finances sorted. When they want to play an expensive sport or need a car, that’s the time to prioritize those big purchases. But right now, with a newborn, it’s all about connection. It’s all about love and security. The more you focus on yourself and your mental health, and less on what the world says you need to buy, the better.
Another huge piece of advice: Make sure your relationship with your partner is strong. They are going to see a different side of you after the baby arrives. You’ll go through a huge transformation, and you’ll need unconditional love and support. So, make sure that person in your life has your back, no matter what.
Motherhood can be so overwhelming, and it’s easy to feel like you're doing everything wrong. But if you just focus on the basics—your mental health, your partner, and the bond you share with your baby—it all becomes a little easier to manage.
Q: How did you decide when the right time was to return to work postpartum?
A: My experience going back to work this time was very different from my first. With my first child, I didn’t have much of a choice—it was more about when my maternity leave ended. But with this baby, the decision was out of my hands. At 13 weeks pregnant, I told my company I was expecting, and a week later, I was laid off. I spent my entire pregnancy stressing about finding another job that would support my family financially and provide health insurance.
Being laid off while pregnant, especially during an election year, made finding a new job incredibly difficult. Job opportunities were limited, and the uncertainty of the future made it even harder. After giving birth to my baby girl, I found myself in the hospital applying to jobs and scheduling interviews. An hour after I returned home from the hospital, I had an interview lined up that I had to attend.
After many interviews over a 6 month period, I finally found a job but my start date was only six weeks after having my daughter. I didn’t get to choose when the “right time” was for me to return to work; I just had to start during the next available training session.
Q: Did you feel like your workplace was understanding of your new role as a parent?
A: I am incredibly grateful to work for two companies that are extremely supportive of parents, particularly as a new mom to two young kids. Both jobs are remote, and they offer a lot of flexibility—one is full-time, and the other is part-time.
Being upfront about my needs was key. In my interviews, I made it clear that flexibility and understanding of my role as a working mother were non-negotiable. This honesty paid off, and it allowed me to secure not just one, but two positions that are supportive, flexible, and understanding of my new role as a parent.
Q: How did you juggle your responsibilities at work with your responsibilities at home?
A: The first few weeks were extremely difficult. I had just spent six months at home with my son while I was unemployed, so it was tough to go back to work and be away from my kids. At the same time, I was adjusting to a new job, which added to the pressure. It felt like I was being pulled in a million different directions.
But things started to change when I remembered something my boss used to emphasize—the importance of delegating tasks for your mental health. I realized that while it’s nice to have the newest gadgets or the best care, it was more important for me to prioritize things that would free up my time. I started investing in house cleaning services and paying my nanny more to handle simple tasks like grocery shopping and doing the kids' laundry. This allowed me to focus more on my work and my kids without stressing over everything else around the house.
Q: How did you find time for self-care while balancing both work and motherhood?
A: Finding time for self-care is still a work in progress, to be honest. I’ve learned that my workouts are often longer because I’m juggling a toddler and a 3-month-old. Sometimes, I incorporate my toddler into the workout—he’ll crawl all over me while I do push-ups, and honestly, it’s chaos, but it’s also a chance for us to be together and bond.
I’ve also come to realize just how important it is for my partner and me to carve out time for ourselves. We make sure to schedule weekly date nights, whether it’s a night out or just something simple at home after the kids go to bed. It’s essential for us to have that time together, just the two of us, to keep our relationship strong amidst all the chaos.
Q: If you could give one piece of advice to a new mom about returning to work, what would it be?
A: My biggest piece of advice would be to be honest—with yourself, your employer, and those around you—about what you need and how you can be supported. This transition is really difficult, and it comes with a lot of mixed emotions, and that’s okay. You’ll figure out what works best for you over time, so be patient with yourself. You don’t have to have it all figured out right away. Give yourself grace and allow yourself the time and space to adjust.