The journey of motherhood doesn’t begin with the baby’s arrival, it begins the moment you find out you’re pregnant. That initial shift in identity, mindset, and body is deeply transformative, and often overlooked when we talk about postpartum changes. The fourth trimester is undeniably important, but it’s just one part of a much longer, more nuanced journey that begins at conception.
🌱 The First Shift: Conception to Pregnancy
The moment you become pregnant, there’s an internal shift — even before your body visibly changes.
- Identity Reframing: Suddenly, your decisions are influenced by someone else growing inside you. There’s a mental shift from “me” to “we.”
- Hormonal Roller Coaster: Progesterone, estrogen, hCG — all working behind the scenes, impacting mood, energy, sleep, and even memory.
- Emotional Changes: Excitement, fear, uncertainty, and awe — it’s all there. And often, women carry these emotions silently while the world expects them to just “glow.”
🤰 Pregnancy: Living Between Two Worlds
Pregnancy is an in between space — you’re not who you were, and not yet who you’re becoming.
- Body Evolution: You’re watching your body stretch, swell, and change — sometimes without your consent. That alone can be a grief process.
- Social Shifts: Relationships start shifting — with partners, friends, even at work. People treat you differently, and not always in ways that feel supportive.
- Mental Load Increases: Birth plans, doctor visits, registry lists, researching feeding choices… all while still trying to be your “old self.”
👶 Postpartum & Matrescence: Rebirth of the Mother
Once the baby arrives, the transformation deepens. Matrescence is the perfect word to capture this metamorphosis.
- Physical Recovery: Healing from birth (whether vaginal or C-section), adjusting to breastfeeding or formula, navigating sleep deprivation.
- Emotional Landscape: Baby blues, postpartum anxiety, depression, or simply feeling the enormity of this new role.
- Loss of Self (and Rebuilding): Many mothers describe feeling like they’ve “lost” themselves — and they have, in some ways. But there’s also a reconstruction that can be incredibly empowering.
💫 Why This MattersRecognizing that motherhood is a process, not a single moment, helps us honor the full arc of transformation. It helps mothers feel seen — not just for the diapers changed or the sleepless nights endured, but for the profound identity work they are doing from the moment they conceive.